


Love Launchpad McQuack 2k19

by KingFranPetty



Series: Funky Launchpad x Jim x Drake threesome [2]
Category: Darkwing Duck (Cartoon 1991), Darkwing Duck (Cartoon 2018), DuckTales (Cartoon 2017)
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Arguing, Attempted Murder, Attempted Seduction, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Crush, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Tension, Bad Dirty Talk, Bad Flirting, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Constructive Criticism Welcome, Dark, Dark Character, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Death Threats, Declarations Of Love, Dirty Talk, Enemies, Evil, Evil Plans, Fights, Flirting, Insults, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Obsession, Obsessive Behavior, Out of Character, Possessive Behavior, Rival Relationship, Rivalry, Seduction, Seduction to the Dark Side, Stalking, Tags Contain Spoilers, Threats, Threats of Violence, Villains, You Have Been Warned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-17 17:32:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18969784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingFranPetty/pseuds/KingFranPetty
Summary: Negaduck brings roses and chocolates to Launchpad's house. This goes poorly.





	Love Launchpad McQuack 2k19

Launchpad McQuack got up to check his door. Someone was ringing his bell, many a little too much. He opened the door with a smile and greeted, "Hello, A..." A greeting he didn't finish. It was knotted somewhere in his throat. Darkwin... Negaduck was standing at his door step, but something was different about him. His costume was a different color and his teeth were sharper. Launchpad couldn't see his face from under the wide brimed hat, it felt like his eyes looked at him differently. Something closer to how one might look at a waffle. Hungry. McQuack stepped backwards from the doorway. He couldn't see what he was holding behind his back. 

Negaduck took out his arms from behind his back. He raised his eyes as he looked at Launchpad. "I got you something." Negaduck sounded happy as he displayed the box and roses. Launchpad breathed out, calmer now. He eyed the rectangle. "What's in the box?" McQuack asked. He turned his attention to the flowers. "Why are there red paint splatters on those?" He continued. Negaduck grinned widely, showing all those shark like teeth. "It's just a box of chocolates and lightly painted flowers." He chuckled darkly. His eyes grew wider. There was something wrong with those eyes. Launchpad McQuack took the flowers and the box. "You didn't have to do this for me." He started. The yellow and black villain stepped inside, replying, "No problem, it was my pleasure." Launchpad McQuack pondered somewhat at how Negaduck had known what kind of chocolate to buy, as he opened the box and ate. 

He almost didn't notice Negaduck watching him eat it, almost. "You should probably leave. I'm sure you have something to get to." Launchpad tried to negotiate the villain into leaving. Negaduck closed the door with his foot... It wasn't exactly a foot. He countered, "I don't think I have anything more important to attend to." Launchpad McQuack cocked his eye at the door, why close it? He was starting to think maybe something else was happening. "You can't stay the night here, you didn't even pack a toothbrush." McQuack pointed out. Negaduck was walking towards him. "You are really cute. So cute it almost hurts. That's why I have to keep you safe from that cheap knock off." Launchpad swallowed the chocolate he was eating.

"Are you talking about DW?" He questioned. Negaduck twitched a eyelid and the corners of his mouth. "No, I'm Darkwing Duck. Remember?" Negaduck reminded. Launchpad McQuack looked at the chocolates and flowers. Both looked, well for lack of better words, Edgy. The roses were skulls somehow and the chocolate looked like small body parts. Things like eyes and ears. He hadn't seen it until had stopped eating them. Launchpad looked back at the orange and yellow villain, just now puzzling it together. Negaduck started, "No no no, don't panic. I'm not here to do anything." 

That was a lie. He was here to kill someone, three guesses who. I'll give you a hint, they are purple. "I am here to protect you, Launchpad. Just listen to me." Negaduck told him. He took a step forward. Launchpad McQuack slowly walked backwards to the door. "Step away from the door, sweetie pie. Let me explain myself." Negaduck grew angrier in tone. Launchpad grabbed the door knob. There was a crash next to them. Someone purple had ran too fast into the room and crashed into the lamp. Darkwing Duck stood up and spoke up, "Negaduck! Come here to lie to my sidekick? Hmmmmm?" Negaduck pulled a chainsaw from hammer space. He pulled back the... You get the idea, he started the chainsaw. The smile returned as he swung the chainsaw. "Glad to see you, Dead Meat Duck!"

Darkwing push back the weapon with the lamp. "Guys, can you not fight in my house? How about we all talk about this?" Launchpad attempted. He did have to live here after all. They were all adults and so that should at least be attempted. They looked at McQuack before nodding. Negaduck disappeared the chainsaw and sat down. Darkwing Duck sat in the furthest chair from him. Launchpad McQuack sat between them. Why did the universe see fit to put him in this conflicting situation? Negaduck glared at DW. DW narrowed his eyes at him. 

Darkwing Duck didn't trust this. It was silent for a moment. Launchpad noticed, "Talking it out if nobody talks about it." He placed the flowers and box on the table. DW saw these two things. "Who did you kill to get those?" He questioned without really expecting an answer. Negaduck didn't give an answer. "Nobody... Yet. I'll be happy to extend that list, starting with you." Launchpad McQuack wasn't going to let this happen again. He knew they didn't have to fight. McQuack but into the chat, "Nobody needs to die. This isn't you. I know you are a hero. My hero." Darkwing took a double take. He crossed his arms. "I thought I was your hero." He steamed. Launchpad corrected, "You are, DW." Negaduck spat at Darkwing, "I am the real Darkwing Duck!" This was going horribly. 

"Both of you need to stop fighting. This isn't solving anything." Launchpad McQuack addressed. They got quiet. Launchpad professed, "Listen, You are both very important to me." The two mirrored reflections of each other made him realize what he just said. "What are you saying?! Are you suggesting that you LIKE the villain?!" DW let his ego speak for him. Negaduck added, "Did this moronic rip off somehow convinced you that he's anything but a poor copy of me?" Darkwing Duck turned his attention to his enemy. He insisted, "I am Darkwing Duck, you Edgy recolor." Negaduck grabbed at Darkwing. Launchpad tried to hold him back. He snarled, "I am going to open your rib cage open with a crowbar and force feed you your own lungs, Drake!" 

Darkwing shifted himself further away from his counter part. Negaduck hissed, "Let go of me, Launchpad. I promise I won't kill him now." This was lie. He was actually planning on breaking each of his joints so he couldn't get away when he started breaking each of his bones. Launchpad did not fall for this. "If you don't stop fighting, I am going to have to ask you to both leave." McQuack stated clearly. Negaduck sat back down. Negaduck remarked sarcastically, "What, do you want us to "kiss and make up?"" Launchpad McQuack thought about it, then nodded. Darkwing Duck jokingly suggested, "Oh, well why don't you join us in this?" Launchpad smiled dumbly and replied, "I didn't know I could do that!" There was silence for a short period of time. 

Negaduck and Darkwing Duck shared a look at each other. Negafuckwit grabbed an arm. "Hey, Launchpad, why don't you give your hero a kiss first?" He offered slyly. Darkwing hugging his other arm, "You should kiss me first, Sweetheart." He pleaded. Negaduck put a hand on Launchpad's leg. "Haven't you always wanted kiss your first crush?" He presumed. DW laid his head on his arm. He assumed, "He is my biggest fan." Negaduck rolled his eyes. "He was my biggest fan first." 

Now if anyone is wondering why Launchpad McQuack isn't talking during this, it's because he's not to explode from having both of them touching him. Darkwing Duck put Launchpad's hand on his knee. "Haven't we known each other long enough to kiss at least once?" He beckoned. Negaduck protested, "Don't let him get inside your head. It's your choice." Of course, the choice he wanted him to make was himself. Launchpad felt so conflicted. How was he supposed to choose now? He really just wanted to kiss both of them. McQuack couldn't decide. So he picked both and neither at the same time. Which is to say he planned to make them kiss each other so they would stop arguing over him. "How about you both close your eyes and I kiss one of you?" He put forth. They shared a "ruin this for me and I will end your whole career" look at another and closed their eyes. The two both made a kissing face and waited for their kiss. Launchpad McQuack grabbed them both and pushed their heads closer together. 

The End.


End file.
